I've recently been looking into other employment opportunities, but I don't want to fall into the trap of taking the first thing that comes along. Rather, I'd like take job where I get to be creative as well as productive. To this end I recently applied for a 6 month contract with TVNZ as a 'Creative Producer'. Here is my cover letter:
To The TVNZ Mastermind It May Concern,
Your ad got me excited. ‘Commercial Creative Producer’ is a terrible title, but the role you describe sparkles with possibilities.
Perhaps ‘Edu-Fun Captain’ would be a better way to be known around the office?
That’s what excites me about this role, the potential to devise and execute on creative terms, to collaborate with talented people and facilitate great production.
You’ve been reading my diary again, haven’t you TVNZ?
My background involves all things entertainment and I have thoroughly enjoyed the challenges that have been thrown at me, except swimming. I am rubbish at swimming.
Still, no matter how difficult the situations in which I have found myself, how mind bendingly technically brain pulverising or how socially anus tighteningly awkward, I have always swum. I have always pulled on my togs and jumped in because that is what I do.
And you might think, we’re not looking for some kind of man-fish-boy. And you’d be right. But I bring a lot more than loose metaphors to the table. I bring a mixture of skill, wit and technical proficiency to rival that of any 13 year old with the Adobe suite and a bare bones social life.
I’m not just clever, I’m scary clever.
Synergy, people. Synergy.
“The interaction of multiple elements in a system to produce an effect different from or greater than the sum of any individual effects.”
It’s total wank and completely apt.
I want to work with you because it will be awesome. And certainly not because working for TVNZ will allow me to complete my set of New Zealand broadcast mugs.
I want to bring my enthusiasm and workaholism to our national broadcaster. Be part of a team with a sweet codename that makes me sound like I can never talk about work. To be based next to a casino and wonder, when are they getting my office?
It’s time to combine my vast technical knowledge, creativity and unreasonably high standards to not just work for you, but with you and with the viewers.
Great content is at the heart of any great production and that is what I will deliver.
A dried up manly-fish-boy is just an added bonus.
My number’s in the back of my diary.